Dear Mom and Dad, Thank you.

I believe the term I used was "whiney, touchy feely bullshit", wouldn't want to call anyone indecisive with words like "wishy, washy". Feelings are great but when you decide to have kids they become your priority, not your feelings but their well being. If your kid is autistic and prone to wandering, by all means strap them into that stylish leash that looks like a backpack with a harness, but not because it makes your life "easier" but because the child is safer with it on. Each child may respond to different types of discipline but there is a difference between discipline and and basic core values. Respect is learned then earned not given with wreckless abandon. Basic core values are generally the same we all would like a certain degree of respect. No one wakes up and says man, I want everyone to treat me like crap today. So why would you let your kid treat you poorly and just hope they learn by watching television that you deserve a certain degree of respect. I have little if any respect for parents who spoil their kids rotten just about the same amount I have for a parent who beats their child. What little respect I do muster is from the very small part of me that questions if perhaps, there is some perfectly reasonable explanation as to why they would allow or cause their child to have such a high probability of becoming a drain on society in one way or another.

"A healthy kid will naturally shy away from adults they do not know" - An equally healthy kid might go up to the same stranger, say hello and proceed to have a conversation about teddy bears and unicorns. The difference between Chatty Kathy and Shy Sam getting ripped away and sold on the black market or breaking their neck after tripping on a horshoe crab is that ones mommy and daddy are not only paying attention, but they also taught their kid not to walk away with strangers, a healthy respect for the rules and to obey the rules not because it was a nice idea, but because it was right if for no other reason because as the parents they love their kid and don't want to see them get hurt by some dirty fuck or a horseshoe crab. The latter of wich falling under the " Because I said so" blanket. Why should I or anyone else with any common sense respect another person's parenting standpoint and point of view if they don't respect their kids or themselves enough to know their value as parents or the importance of basic core values.

Yes, everyone has their own set of values but there is one universal way to consider it, do to others as you would have them do to you. If I was letting my 5 year old be rude or disrespectful to me or themselves, I would want someone to let me know I was being hypnotized by the charms of a child and allowing them to walk all over me therefore ensuring that my kid would learn this behaviour was acceptable. I would want someone to keep me from allowing my child to have this lack of respect that they then treat other adults and children with. It may not feel good to be reminded of my job as an aduolt and parent but it would certainly humble me enough to want to keep my kid from embarassing me the next time we go out. Perhaps you would keep it to yourself, sit on it and then in your old age, sitting in the very nice looking, very expensive home your sweet children put you in, wonder why the poorly disciplined, ilmannered nurses and general staff, made up mostly of these peoples kids treat you like garbage. While you let their parents do it their way because, well maybe there's a reason, imagine these kids letting you lay on the floor with that broken hip, because they need a cigerette and they need it now, your pain is not nearly as important as their hourly fix, is it? Ponder the politeness of it all while you sit in bed stewing in your own fluids at 80, 90 or 100 years old because everyone took lunch but poor, sensitive Billy who can't get to everyone and didn't know how to say," Hey this is wrong", while you sit hungry at lunch only to watch Tammy eat your pudding cuz she couldn't afford her own dessert after maxing out her credit cards on nails or tanning.

Clearly this is worst case scenario but is it really all that far from possible if everyone sticks their head in the sand and says "Well, to each their own." or "We don't know their situation", it's common sense, kids getting punched in the face stand up for him if you don't who will? Same can be applied to lazy, half assed or parentless parenting, children are children no matter how adultlike you try to treat them. Who will be left to mention, politely of course,that treating others with respect is a swell thing to do, if by adulthood they haven't been taught to respect simple family, parent and child roles. They certainly won't grow to respect their elders any more as adults than as children if we all say oh well not my problem and leave them to their own devices. Generally, people do not wake up and suddenly say "Today is the day I treat myself and others with respect." You learn to respect yourself, you learn to respect others as they earn your respect , but you don't give respect to people who don't know the value of the sentiment or meaning of the word. As those people learn self respect, they earn your respect and you learn to respect them.

No, it's not politically correct or openly popular to voice your opinion with wild abandon, but if properly placed it's sure as hell can be more effective than hoping they'll get a clue and want to hear someone elses opinion. If you don't want to listen, then don't but the freedom to say it was once of the great beauties of this country. Words had less power and more freedom. I have the freedom to sit at my computer and type out my feelings and opinions on any topic, because you can choose not to read them, but I really shouldnt state simple observances out loud and in front of anyone who may just need a reminder of their responsibility, because, it may hurt someones feelings and once I've said them they're out there hurting peoples feelings and raising awkward questions about what came first the bad parent or the bad child. Being sensitive and healthy is good and well but all the more reaason to speak your mind when you see foolishness that will someday and in some way effect you.

You are completely right, there is no clear cut training manual on how to be a good parent but if people use a little common sense and put their kids ahead of themselves, keeping in mind that they would like their kids to someday show everyone the same kind of respect that they themselves would like to be shown, we may just make out ok. No, it does not feel good to send a kid to time out, take away a treat or tv time, send them to bed early or without a bed time story and yes it is sad or irritating to watch them pout or throw a tantrum but it is part of the job as a parent to follow through and not let cute kids turn into sociopaths and narcissist. Nature can only explain away a few the rest were nurtured right on into these mentalities. As for social darwinism, the runts of the litter eventually get killed off or die out apply this concept to human beings, not everyone is meant to be a parent but technology and poor parenting have landed us in quite a pickle, because now everyone can produce children they just can't raise them. Did they want friends, kids or someone for their friends kids to play with, did they make a mistake and now the kid and the rest of society has to suffer their actions? I'm all for abortion, adoption or even dare I say a womens right to have her tubes tied upon request. Your body is your business but if you can't handle the consequences of your decision to have a baby by having sex, implanting eggs or sperm or both, be ready to hear my boldly opinionated loud mouth in the grocery store, at Ikea or anywhere else where I may have to witness your bad parenting and don't get your panties or feelings in a bunch, I am telling the guy or gal that beats their kid the same thing, just as loudly.