Hey asshole, you're becoming more of an asshole...

I spent my weekend in a timewarp, I was sixteen again being silent and kept in check. The thing is I'm not sixteen anymore and silent and in check is much harder than it used to be. I think for everyone different friends get different parts of us. I have two friends I have known now for 20 years, they are both very different, and extremely loved. They know more of me than I do at times and for some reason they still stick around. Aside from these two I am fortunate enough to have many people in my extended family, these people are the people I would do anything for, the people who have picked me up and put me together each time I've fallen off the wall. These are the people that sit at my table. They are all amazing, they are all perfect in their own way and even the worst of them has atleast one redeeming quality, even if it is hard to find. Over the past few years I've made some knew friends, grown up a little and done my very best to stand on my own. The thing about friends is we all have one or two that cannot grasp that we're not kids anymore and that things change and eventually people do too. This weekend was all about that friend.
That friend at times can be a giant asshole. That friend can also be the one who gives you a reason to wake up when you start to give up. At 18 that friend was one of only three friends I ever got to see and on my 19th birthday she was the friend who took care of me as I watched my future shift. 8 years later, I think maybe I've said thank you enough and I wonder if maybe its time I give up on this friend ever truly realizing it goes both ways. The thing is I can't help but hope and believe that underneath the mean girls attitude and the narcissism the funny friend who wanted to take her daughter to festivals, sell bumper stickers, and randomly move to florida, still lives. It's hard for me to watch this person I love, forget where we came from. It is also hard for me to remember that she didn't come from the same place, we just both happened to be in the same place for a while. The bottom line is even assholes have people who know they're not complete assholes, these same people are left with the responsibility of very carefully yet firmly updating the asshole as to their status as an asshole. This is infact, the worst job ever.