Talk is cheaper than gasoline.

I am a sinner, I have no desire to be redeemed by some god or higher power. I have no hope that my morals will some day adjust to suit the requirements of the society in wich I live, I simply wish to live. I am willing to change if provided valid reasons to do so or if the spirit moves me. I hold grudges and am overly disgusted by people who hurt those that I love, this will not likely change. My relationships with those that I love will change. The people we grow with are the same people we will some day see at the grocery store and say hello to and continue walking towards the tampons or eggs we came in for. It becomes clearer as we get older the bonds that kept us together in our youth are now, the very thing that keep us from being that guy or girl at the grocery store. In the changing times and the adult lives we are all moving further into, there will be casualties, perspective will change and priorities will shift. We are the people we have become and for some of us that is something to be proud of for others there is still more to strive for. I look at the people I am fortunate enough to have in my life and I am grateful.

The people I choose to surround myself with are not competition, they are family. When one of us succeeds it is my belief a part of each of us is successful as well, a small part, but a part nonetheless. We all go through hard times and those are the times we pull together in whatever ways we can. Your friends are not people you hope to be better than your friends are people you hope to be better with. I will always want to be better tomorrow than I am today that is my goal, I look at my friends as inspirations. I wouldn't want to become an accountant or a nurse, a stay at home mom or manage people. I wouldn't want to have a mortgage or children right now but I am damn proud of each person in my life that is already doing or is on their way to these things. These people give me a reason to go out and do what makes me happy. These people I look up to and think to myself someday pieces of my life may resemble what you've got going on because these accomplishments help me every day to see more clearly what I want for myself. These friends all contribute to who I am today as well as who I will become. There is a rough road ahead of me to get things on a track thats headed to the brighter days I long for. But along that road there are plenty of people whose experiences I can learn from. I am willing to let certain things go lately with a little less fight because there is so much I need to accomplish and complete that I don't care as much as I used to about the little shit.

As we get older and search for partners in life our partners will not always be group approved, I will never love my close friends girlfriend, I believe she is wasting valuable air, but they have a child whom I do love and I love my friend this means I try as hard as I can to respect the situation and respect the girl. Cheating, lying, and or pretending its all ok once these things have happened or been discovered. These are things I would never accept in a relationship. Everyone has different expectations in relationship, I would expect brutal honesty. Personally I believe cheaters have two choices, hide it and hide it well or be honest, by all means tell the person you love and want to be with that you have some things to deal with and are thinking about or are activily fucking some one else, but know that when you decide to be honest about your cheating your only doing it to make yourself feel better. I'm not sure I'd know what to do if someone I love and am in a committed relationship with, committed a highlevel "relationship foul". What I do know is respect is earned not by apologies and bullshit but by genuine effort to become a better person. No excuse will ever be valid. Redemption and respect they are earned by actions. The world is full of people unwilling to own their actions, don't be that guy, that guy sucks.